


Phantom Pain

by daisysakura



Category: Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst and Tragedy, Gen, Peter deserved better, hurt without comfort, there's no MCU without Peter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-23
Updated: 2020-02-23
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:34:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22861843
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daisysakura/pseuds/daisysakura
Summary: Based on the very real possibility of the MCU losing Spider-man. Takes place during Sony vs Disney but that's not mentioned here. There will be no fourth wall breaking here.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	Phantom Pain

**Author's Note:**

> This is based on the old news that Spider-man would be leaving the MCU after Sony and Disney negotiations failed. Thankfully, that's been cleared up for now.

"I'm glad you could stop by, Steve. It's not an Avengers party without Captain America." Sam teases as he shifts in his seat.

"Sam, I've told you-"

"I meant the _original_ Captain America. Though you're retired, just your presence alone will be enough to boost our team morale. Even if you're an old man."

Something in the man's voice makes Steve pause, his drink halfway to his mouth. "Does it need a boost?" He ignores the old man quip seeing as he's heard it plenty of times. It's gotten as old as, well, himself.

Sam sighs, "I'm not sure what happened, but ever since last week, something feels off. Training's the same, the group is the same, we're as close as ever but,"

"But?"

"The kid came by last week to get some more input for the new suits and it felt...wrong."

"Wrong how? Wrong as it wasn't him or there was something wrong with him?"

"Nah, it was definitely him but it felt like maybe he shouldn't be here? I can't even explain it but the whole team feels like an incomplete puzzle. There's a piece missing even though the damn puzzle is finished. Does that make sense?"

Steve looks like he's trying to understand but it's obvious he doesn't. Before he's given a chance to speak, they're interrupted by the others.

"Hey, Cap, how's it going?" Hawkeye greets with a clap to the man's shoulder.

"Clint, it's great to see you,"

"Too bad you weren't here twenty minutes ago. He almost missed his shot." Bucky adds with a grin.

"I never miss. I didn't miss."

Steve sees them laughing with one another but Sam's right. There's a feeling he can't quite pinpoint swirling within them.

"You are upset the kid forgot your new suit. You should not let distractions get to you so easily." Wanda chimes in with a knowing grin.

"I am not upset about some damn suit. I'm perfectly capable of making my own, thank you very much."

"You're supposed to look like a hero, not some emo ninja."

Clint grabs Sam in a chokehold, both grown men rolling around on the ground like children. Steve wants to laugh but he doesn't. It's almost like he's waiting for something; for someone to say something before joining them on the ground. He looks up at Wanda and Bucky, both with a sad smile on their faces. They're waiting too but for what, Steve doesn't know. He feels like he shouldn't be happy - like he shouldn't be having a good time with his old team. Not when...his mind goes blank.

"Kids, what can you do, right?" Bucky asks with a forced grin.

After watching them train for a while, it's time to leave. Steve gives Wanda a hug, letting her know he's proud of her. He shakes hands with Sam who pulls him into a hug of his own. Clint just waves him off, knowing they'll see each other later for something or other. Steve looks around for a second, waiting for somebody else to say goodbye when he realizes there i _s_ nobody else.

Once at his car, he turns to his old friend, "Bucky, why did nobody mention his name? Everyone just referred to him as the kid."

Bucky shrugs, "I can't speak for them but for me, it feels wrong saying his name. To tell the truth, I feel like he shouldn't be here. I'm not trying to be an ass about it but it feels off, Harley feels off. Like he doesn't belong or he's trying to replace someone."

That's when Steve figures out the feeling they're giving off. It's loss; they're acting like they've lost somebody even though everyone is accounted for. It's like some kind of phantom pain. Something that is no longer there but it's causing them pain.

"That doesn't seem right or fair to the kid. I'm sure it wasn't easy taking over for Tony. Besides, he doesn't want to become the new Iron Man, he just wants to help however he can."

"Never said it was fair, but Steve," Bucky looks at him. "You can't say his name either."

* * *

.

.

.

"Morgan, did you finish your homework?"

The little girl nods before realizing her mother can't see her from where she's washing dishes. "Yes, mom. I even called big, uh, Harley to make sure I didn't make a mistake."

Pepper finishes the dishes then takes a seat behind her daughter who is currently working on a toy robot she took apart.

"Honey, why is it you don't call," Not for the first time since last week, she finds it difficult to say the kid's name but she manages. "Why don't you call Harley your big brother anymore? Before this week, I wasn't sure you even knew he had a name."

Morgan stops her movement, slowly backing away from the robot. She looks up at Pepper and the woman is shocked to see tears forming on her daughter's face.

"Morgan, what's wrong? Why are you crying?" She asks kneeling down to wrap her arms around the small girl.

"I love Harley but I can't call him my big brother. Not anymore."

"Did he do something to upset you?"

Morgan shakes her head.

"Then, why the sudden change?"

"I think I had another big brother. A brother who reminded me of daddy a lot. He would help me with my homework and play with me. He was smart and funny and he would swing-" Without warning, Morgan begins to cry. She cries harder than Pepper can ever remember her doing. Soon, Pepper's own eyes begin to water. She doesn't understand why but she thinks she understands Morgan. There's a feeling of loneliness in their home even though Harley stops by every chance he gets.

That in itself is weird as well. Harley has always stopped by; ever since the Blip, he's been a constant in their home. Yet, this week has felt as if Harley was just dropped into their lives. No, not dropped. More like swapped. It's almost as if Harley is filling in for somebody else which isn't fair to him.

Or maybe they're just missing Tony more than usual? There's no other explanation for this feeling. Pepper holds her daughter closer. But why does this feel different? This isn't the same feeling of loss as when Tony died, this was leaving a deep sense of loneliness that wasn't there before. Like they were missing a best friend, Morgan's imaginary brother. It wasn't an imaginary brother, though. Pepper is sure they're just missing Tony. Yes, that's all it is.

"Oh, sweety. It's ok to cry, I miss your daddy too."

Neither says what they're feeling. It's not just Tony that is being missed. They just don't know who else it could be.

* * *

.

.

.

Steve walks up to the familiar place, knocking on the door with only a slight hesitation. After talking with his old friends, he feels like something _is_ wrong but he doesn't know what. If somebody's messed with their minds, Dr. Strange would know, right?

Stephen opens the door and for a split second, Steve thinks the Sorcerer Supreme looks...upset before the man quickly recovers. "Steve Rogers, can't say I'm surprised to see you." He welcomes the man inside, offering something to drink but Steve declines.

"I won't take long. I take it I'm not the first to stop by?"

Stephen shakes his head, "It seems our group of associates has been feeling "off" and thought I could help."

The good doctor acts like himself but Steve knows there's something else. Stephen looks defeated which is something the former captain didn't think he'd see. They have a seat at a small table, Steve looking around the place, wondering if he'll find what he's looking for here.

"Is there something going on? Something you're not telling us?"

"Of course, not."

"Something you _can't_ tell us?"

"Captain,"

"Steve, please call me Steve."

"Steve, if there was something threatening to destroy our planet once more, I would not keep it quiet if I knew others needed to know. As it is, we're approaching the one year anniversary of that fateful day. The day we came back and Thanos was destroyed. The anniversary of the loss of our comrades - it's only normal for people to feel uneasy."

Steve doesn't detect a lie but he knows Stephen is good at avoiding the truth when he needs to. Unfortunately, he also knows Strange won't give up any information unless lives are at stake. "So this phantom pain, will it go away?"

"I'm sure it will,"

With a sigh, Steve nods in defeat. Not bothering to ask how Stephen knows that. "So everything is as it should be?"

In that second, Steve could almost swear he saw a glimpse of hurt in the doctor's eyes but it's gone before he can be sure.

"Everything is as it's supposed to be. I would know otherwise."

"Right, of course, you would know. I'm sorry to have bothered you."

"It's no bother."

"Thank you, I'll see you later, Doctor." Steve thanks him for his time and takes his leave.

Stephen walks back inside, almost dropping into his seat. He rests his head into his hands, feeling the weight of guilt threatening to force him to use his power for selfish reasons. Damn the consequences, he thinks, but he knows he can't mess with fate.

_"I don't blame you."_

Stephen closes his eyes, "That makes me feel worse."

_"Hey, the universe decided I didn't belong and took me out. That's not your fault."_

"You _know_ I might be able to do something about it, yet, you haven't asked."

_"I know. It would be great to see my family and friends again but I know better than to disrupt the universe's plan. I wouldn't want to cause another catastrophic incident."_ The transparent boy laughs albeit hollow.

"You helped save the universe, you'd think it'd be more appreciative."

_"Dr. Strange?"_

"Yes?"

_"Will they be ok?"_

And if it isn't like him to worry about everyone else...Stephen nods. "They'll be fine. After some time, they'll forget that feeling of loss - of loneliness that appeared out of nowhere. They'll move on; the universe back to how it was meant to be. Harley seems to have fit right in."

He doesn't tell the boy he'll be forgotten; completely erased from existence. He doesn't have to say it, they both know it.

_"That's good. I'd hate to leave them feeling sad for the rest of their lives."_

Stephen hears the sadness in the boy's voice. He hears the silent plea for help, to change everything back to where he's real and belongs with the friends and family he worked so hard to make and keep safe. It wasn't fair.

_"Dr. Strange?"_

Stephen turns to him, hoping the boy won't ask for the help they both know he's not allowed to give.

_"Will it hurt?"_

"No," He answers quick and sure. _You'll just disappear, never having existed like the universe had originally intended it. Everything will be as it was supposed to be but that doesn't mean it's how it should be now. Not after everything._

The boy smiles a large shaky smile. He's afraid, he's scared of what's going to happen and Stephen can't blame him.

_"That's something then. It would be a shame if I went away in agonizing pain after Mr. Stark saved me. I'm glad_ _ **he'll**_ _never be forgotten."_

Stephen clenches his fists. If it had been anyone else, Strange is sure that would have been said with bitterness but not with him, never with him. "This universe may forget you, Peter Parker, but I will not. That I swear." And in the end, that's all Stephen can do for the boy.

Peter blinks then sheepishly smiles, _"Thank you. For not forgetting me and for not letting me go through this alone. I think I might have been scared otherwise."_

Dr. Strange doesn't point out how much Peter's legs are shaking, or how tears are now streaming down his face.

_"It was a great life. I wish I'd had more time to spend with Morgan, I promised Mr. Stark I would always be there for her. I hope he doesn't hold it against me seeing as this was actually not my fault for once."_

"I'm sure he'd blame you for something. That man wasn't happy unless he was blaming others."

_"That's true but Mr. Stark was a great man. It sucks I won't see him again since I don't have a soul anymore."_

Really, how much could things go wrong if Stephen forced the universe to give the boy back? A lot, he's sure.

_"Dr. Strange?"_

"Yes, Peter?"

_"Take care of them?"_

With a sigh, Stephen nods. "Of course." He says to the now empty room. An innocent soul has gone because the universe made a mistake.

Nobody in their group of friends knows why they suddenly wept at that moment. All except for one man who will live with a forgotten memory for the rest of his life.

"Goodbye, Spider-man."

**Author's Note:**

> I can't even read that without crying. I love Tom Holland as young Spider-man. The MCU won't be the same without him when he eventually leaves. *Ugly cries* Harley seemed to be the logical, or easiest, person to shove in there, hope it doesn't come to that.
> 
> Hope you didn't enjoy? Maybe it was too sad? I don't know, leave me a review so I can figure it out. :)


End file.
